Wednesday 14 November 2018

I Am

I am, as are you,
But now I know my value
I think, I feel, I understand,
A little bit deeper than most others can,
Do I see it as my very special gift?
Or a cross that I often struggle to lift?

It can be that which weighs me down,
Makes it harder for me to wipe away that frown,
And yet, once I understand and accept it,
As being me, I can very well name it.

No, its not easy to feel and empathise naturally,
Its not easy to see what's not always said quite openly,
Its not always easy to care and want to be there,
When people are mostly insanely unaware.

It has taken me a long long time to discover,
That my very kryptonite can actually be my superpower,
But I need to use it with care and caution,
Because it does not come with an on and off button.

It has been hard long years, till I understood it.
Embraced it as my own and actually loved it.
When all the confusing pieces seem to finally fall in place,
And I felt myself glow in its embrace.

Now I know what I want and need,
And often what I need to pull away like a weed.
I know what I am not, and never wish to be,
So pretending to fit in, is no longer me.

I love, I like and truly care,
For people I meet here and there,
I want meaning in my human interactions,
And hence a drudgery for me is meaningless conversations.

I feel the life in me slowly ebb away,
When diplomacy or pretence come into play,
I am not good at those things I tell you,
I am just not built for that scenario.

I am honest, what you see is what you get,
Over formal pretences I never ever fret.
I can see through lies and find them draining,
I want to know the real you, that is what is truly interesting.

I now know, that the world is not like me,
But I do know too, that there are some more oddballs like me,
We feel, we hear, we think, we love truly and deeply,
And we often see that which is hidden or mentioned subtly.

It fills me with joy to make a true connection,
To know someone well and share undisguised emotion ,
And blessed am I that I have such beautiful people,
In my life, to keep it fulfilled and simple.

I have to share,
Genuine concern and care,
The superficial is just not what I can give,
And neither can in it, I thrive or live.

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